Dear Abe: I am smaller than four sisters. One of them, Rachel Cancer has lost several years ago. We and I considered the “failures” of the family because we had to work hard to care for our families, while our other sister married money. Rachel has not participated in many family meetings because she, I think she felt was not in place. I didn't understand that after that, but I am doing now after I went because I feel the same way.
It is strict for me now when my sisters come to the city. They do not understand how difficult it is to work at work. They believe that we and our children, who work hard, can take time at any time to meet with them when they point out short notice. It is strict, and I am not sure how to deal with this. Please help. – “Failure” in Florida
Dear “failure”: Your “successful” sisters seem annoyingly alone. The next time you receive an invitation in a short notice, explain to them the patience of the difference in your lifestyle, and indicate that it prevents you from changing your schedule at the drop of the hat. Then tell them how much time you need to prepare. (Why do you want to gather with anyone who makes you feel “less than” teaching me.)
Dear Abe: She divorced for 10 years and has been married since then. She started dating my current wife nine years ago. I have four daughters, between the ages of 24 and 37 years. Since the divorce, our relationships have been strained because my ex -husband continues to detention emotionally by feeding her novel that I am the bad man to start the divorce. Since my daughters seem to be all that their mother tells them, it was difficult to reintegrate them into their lives because they do not know what they believe or those who trust him.
My new wife feels frustrated when they do not call me big events (birthdays, father's feast, holidays, etc.). And I feel panic because her children point to my contact point for every event. Should I continue to accept the place of things with my daughters and wait for them to realize that I am not the monster of their mother drew me? Or should I try to have a difficult conversation with each of them and take my chance to say the wrong thing and make things worse? – Cursed if you did or not
Dear Latun: I am not sure of the circumstances that made you divorce her mother, but your daughters are no longer children. They are completely in adulthood. I think the conversation with each of them is in good condition.
If you come close to the topic, saying that things do not always work as planned, and did you find that you live with their mother to be acceptable, you will remain married, it may make the remainder of what you should say more. If your ex -husband accuses you of marital infidelity, you have the right to defend yourself as long as you do not seduce her mother's personality (which is probably what she did).
Dear Abe, written by Abigil van Burin, also known as Jin Phillips, and was founded by her mother Pauline Phillips. Call my dear Abby to http://www.dearabby.com or Po Box 69440, Los Angeles, California 90069.
