Ricki Lake has spoken out about her ex-husband Christian Evans' struggle with mental health.
The former talk show host recalls trying to “rescue” Evans — who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder — from “psychotic breaks” before his death by suicide in 2017.
“I didn't understand what bipolar disorder meant at first,” Lake told death doula Alua Arthur at End Well's annual symposium on Nov. 22, according to People magazine.
“I know he was depressed and was in a lot of pain. We were together four years before he had his first psychotic break. It was more shocking seeing him turn into someone else than his eventual death.”
I went to great lengths to save him; “I did everything I could to get him to the doctor to get help, and it was really hard,” Lake, 56, continued.
“He had a second psychotic break two years after the first, and it eventually took his life [February] For the year 2017.”
Lake and Evans first started dating in 2010 after they were introduced by a mutual friend, per People.
“He was so charming, he was madly in love with me and me with him,” she said of their relationship, adding that their unconventional first encounter involved a “medicinal journey” with ayahuasca.
They were engaged in August 2011 and eloped in 2012. Lake and Evans separated in 2014. However, they remained close until his death.
Lake described feeling as if she had failed Evans because she could not “save” him.
“I'm a manager, and I get things done,” she said. “And when it came to fixing it, I couldn't fix it, I couldn't save it.”
Lake has since married Ross Burningham, but is keeping Evans' memory alive by continuing to talk about her ex-partner.
“What I can say is that through loving and losing him, I am the best version of myself because of the way he loved me,” she said.
“I feel like I've learned a lot of lessons, a lot of what I love, how we're still connected and they're not gone,” Lake added.
“But he had to leave so I could have this beautiful, abundant life that I appreciate every day. I wake up grateful and appreciative of this life I had with him and now without him.
If you or someone you know is affected by any of the issues raised in this story, call or text the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline on 988.
