Dear Abe: What do you say when going to a visiting visit that is not boycotted? I have an aunt who has been diagnosed with late stage cancer and I recently went to Hospice. It may have one to four months to live. I used to spend time around her during family jobs when I was younger, but I haven't seen it at least a decade, although we live in the same city.
I am good in conducting a small conversation under normal circumstances and I know how to write cards for birthdays, etc., but what do you say to a person who dies that you have not spoken to for a long time? You cannot ask, “How are you?” Or treat them as it is the last time you will see it (even if it might be). I would like to visit it before you pass, but I am confused. Please help. My nephew in the state of Idaho
Dear my nephew: Many depend on the situation where your relative is when you visit. Keep in mind, she may have some things that she would like to tell you. However, some things that you may transfer:
“Thank you for seeing me. I know that it has been some time since we saw each other, but I wanted to come and tell you how much I always enjoyed the time we spent together in all the functions of the family. Thank you Therefore. I will not stay long because I don't want you to waste your energy, but you have to know that I love you and I will always do. ”
I understand that your presence there is less important than anything you might say to her. Remember that if you stumbled for words.
Dear Abe: I was with my husband for 40 years. As in all marriages, we had our rise and decline, but recently I could not stand around it. He was deceived several times, and he is angry when I try to warn him that they are fraud. We have separate bank accounts, and it made him start giving me money for his share of family bills when he gets their salaries so that he does not blow them up. Now if I ask him where he spends his money, he ignores me.
Last night, he asked me about what I bought from a specific place. I asked him why I needed to tell him because he did not tell me where the money is spent. He said, “Because you are my wife, and I love you.” When I asked why the opposite does not seem to apply, of course, he did not say anything.
Later, he asked if I was angry, and I told him that I am more mad. Nothing said the rest of the night and today he behaves like every day (which means very little interaction). I don't know what to do anymore. Do you have any advice? – A frustrated wife in Iowa
Dear wife: You bet I do. If you hear about a couple who need to provide advice marriage, this is two of you. Therapists hear marriage and family about this type of things often. Ask your doctor to refer you to a licensed and qualified person to help you and your husband to this harsh correction.
Dear readers: Along with millions of Americans watching this memorial day, my prayers were added to these courageous men and women who sacrificed their lives in our country. We hope that they will rest in peace. – Love, Abe
Dear Abe, written by Abigil van Burin, also known as Jin Phillips, and was founded by her mother Pauline Phillips. Call my dear Abby to http://www.dearabby.com or Po Box 69440, Los Angeles, California 90069.
